Saturday, August 30, 2014

I'M SICK. POOR ME. *BUT THIS IS IMPORTANT!*

I feel horrible. I got home from Germany on Thursday w/ acute bronchitis.
Yep, home, doctor, bed. 
I told my sister just a few minutes ago that I had to write this blog post right now 
even while I'm feeling icky because it's so important.
No pictures to attach - I don't feel well enough to search my photos 
for ones that would work. So, this time you just get my words.

Here's my question.
What the heck is going on people??
When did we stop showing our love, our gratitude, our blessings, 
when did we stop care giving, when did we stop saying thank you, 
making our family more important than our job, our gym, our phone, our hobbies??
And, of course, my rant comes from a couple of things that have happened recently. 
...And running with it on the phone with Joan!

There are many qualities of etiquette that have changed over the last 45 years when I was a teen and taking etiquette classes. Things that have changed from 25 years ago when I was raising my boys and passing on what I believed in from my upbringing. 
But, there are some things that should never change. #Never

We have become so busy, I think, that we've lost sight of what's important.
When we get God first, family second and job third out of order, we quickly begin the snowball that becomes the size of Frosty; rolling rolling rolling. 
So busy, busy, busy. No time to think about anything but work. 
Too tired to think about anything but work.

There's many examples and they don't all include work, but a lot do.
I'm 61 this year and didn't realize my age to the extent I do now, not until I saw 
a particular wedding picture that had my two daughter-in-laws being hugged from the side by me, their mother-in-law. Oh, how I hate that term. The photo showed me looking like I look to everyone but me. In reality, I'm 61 years old. #61 And, I have the etiquette standards of someone "old".
So be it. I'm old. I look old in the wedding picture. So embarrassing when you have no idea you look old. But, I have etiquette values that I try (sometimes unsuccessfully) to hold as a standard in the way I live my life. And, those values are a good thing.

Putting God first has never been an issue. My problem has been not letting my physical adventures get in the way of keeping my family first. Not really an issue for me unless it involves getting a birthday present or Christmas presents in the mail on time!

When you are the one that is aware and believes in certain points of etiquette and those around you don't practice the same, it can be very hard not to be in a state of disappointment. That's where prayer saves my life. Well, most times. Sometimes one just can't help but be in a state of disappointment for a few moments.

So, what are those points of etiquette that I think are so vitally important and that have, for the most part, been pushed to the wayside?

1. If you receive a card or handwritten letter in the mail, you need to acknowledge that. A simple text message thanking the sender is adequate according to the Etiquette Book of Jan (though I seriously abhor text messaging as a way of communication). It works here and let's the sender know that it not only arrived, but that you appreciate the time it took the sender to "think of you".

2. If you receive a package in the mail - a birthday present, Christmas presents, a "just because" present, any "gift" - you simply must acknowledge receipt of it along with a heartfelt thank you. It's so hard in this day and age to find time for extras (isn't that basically what this post is about??) that getting a present put in the mail is a bit of a chore. All of the time involved, the $$...it's a sincere act of love. And, it deserves a thank you. It deserves more than a text message. Try a phone call, an email, a written note. Do something (but, please don't send a text).

3. After God, make sure you're putting your family first. That begins with you and your partner, your children and your extended family. And, may I say something here that will no doubt make some of you roll your eyes??

When you, my child, "fly the coop" and start becoming your own person and then roll into being your own person? Don't forget your parents. Don't forget your mom. God made you whom you are through the efforts of your parents. And, speaking as a mom, I am still your mom. And, though no longer #1 in your life, I'm your biggest supporter, your biggest fan and, even if you've forgotten, your first love. So, just because you're now an adult, don't make the mistake of cutting your mom/your parents out of your life. Seriously? Not going to be around forever and speaking from experience, don't waste the time you have now to get to know me/us as people, not just as your parents. We're more awesome than you even realize. But to know that, you have to get to know us. (Do you know your mom's favorite dessert? Her favorite movie? Her favorite scripture? Her favorite outside pastime? Stories of great adventure and fun from her past? Her college days? Etc., etc., etc......)

So, there, I've said all I came to say. Maybe I said too much. But, I stand by what I said. 
I hope I said it clearly enough that it makes sense.
I would love your feedback. Disagreement said in a kind way is welcome.
The End.

Be blessed. Be a blessing. 

2 comments:

Happy Commenter said...

You can delete my comments, but they will forever be etched in your mind. Often the truth is hard to accept when one is so myopic. I will pray for the eyes of your understanding to be opened. And I will not be upset when you do not send a proper thanks. ;)

Sue Kosec said...

You took the words (all of them) right out of my mouth, Jan. Thank you for stating what should be the obvious!
SuZeQ

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